


Welcome To My World

by kalologix



Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Angst, Betrayal, Gen, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-07
Updated: 2016-05-07
Packaged: 2018-06-06 21:21:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6770401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kalologix/pseuds/kalologix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With AJ Styles working his way towards the World Heavyweight Championship, Roman Reigns has to focus all of his energy on protecting it. Friendships are of no importance to him now. A public heel turn leaves his former partner and brother, Dean Ambrose, wondering what's left for him after being betrayed yet again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Welcome To My World

Music was the only escape that Dean Ambrose had left. It was the only thing that gave him peace from his stressful job, his faltering friendships and especially his empty home life. You'd never guess it by his demeanor or his words, but Dean was a music buff. It didn't matter what else was going on - the moment a band that Dean liked released a new album, you bet your ass he was the first one out of the car and on his way to the shops to buy it when the superstars landed in a new town.

Sometimes Dean was convinced that his MP3 player could read his mind. It didn't matter what kind of mood he was in, as soon as his earbuds were in and he hit shuffle the songs that played never failed to fit into the moment. He had turned to music when he lost his United States Championship, when he lost his Intercontinental Championship, and of course at the end of every relationship he had ever been in. Since June of 2014, though, his dependence on music had doubled, if not tripled. 

Seth's betrayal had crippled him. It came out of nowhere and the only way Dean knew how to put it into words was that it felt like a bullet through the chest and hands squeezing the air from his lungs all at the same time. He had tried to forget, tried to forgive, and had damn sure tried to get even; but nothing worked quite as well as escaping into the almost painfully loud bass that vibrated against his eardrums.

Most of dean's music was angry. Tales of lost love and broken promises were shouted with a venom so potent it made his veins burn. Each song felt like it was tailor made for him, to fit his anger - no matter how ridiculous that seemed to his more rational mind. He would run to the speed, punch to the beat and scream over the lyrics for hours on end until his voice gave out or he felt better. Whichever came first.

With all of this in mind, it only made sense that Dean would turn to music as a savior once again after the night he had had. The pain was still fresh on his heart after having been betrayed yet again by someone he loved. Roman Reigns had big fish to fry, and Dean wasn't one of them. Not anymore. 

The Bullet Club was back in full force with AJ Styles, Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows at its head. Roman and the Usos had been running rampant, trying to keep their integrity and establish their superiority and dominance. With AJ's constant attempts at taking the World Heavyweight Championship from Roman, he was on the constant defense. Dean understood Roman's dedication to protecting and fighting alongside Jimmy and Jey - they were cousins. They were his family. But Roman and Dean were brothers.. Weren't they? Weren't they supposed to protect each other like that?

"I don't have time for this anymore, Dean. I'm the champion. I have responsibilities, and dealing with you and your crazy shit, pretending that you and I are still the same now that Seth's gone? Well that just ain't one of them. It's one versus all now. Friendship does nothing but hurt you and hold you back in this business. You Dean, you are holding me back. I'm done with you. I'm done with this alliance."

Dean only smiled and walked away through the pain he felt in his chest. The least Roman could've done was tell him this in private, or through a phone call or a text. But Roman was a showboat and the drama and hatred this public heel turn would generate would only serve to motivate him more, regardless of what it would do to Dean.  
Dean had only taken a few steps away from the apron when he heard fans to his left and right screaming for him to look out. His heart dropped into his stomach as he spun around to come face to face with Roman, his best friend, his brother, flying towards him through the ropes of the ring. The spear connected with Dean’s body, and Dean’s body connected with the cold concrete floor beneath him. His head was spinning and his body ached as Roman stood, smirking down at Dean’s battered body.

The ringside medics rushed to Dean’s side and got him to his feet, dragging him towards the backstage area to check out the gash in the back of his head that he hadn’t yet noticed was there. Tears of anger and hurt pricked at the back of his eyes as he looked at Roman, barely even recognizing him with that sick smile gracing his lips. Dean thrashed and pulled free from the medics, stumbling over to a stage hand to grab a microphone. He wrapped his hands around it and bellowed with a shaky, angry voice:

“You’re no better than Seth.”

They checked Dean out backstage and decided he was fine to leave. Not that he would’ve listened to them if they had told him otherwise. On his way out of the medical room he brushed past a few people and paid them no mind as he made his way to his locker. He opened it and stared inside intently, then took out his leather jacket, keys, wallet and MP3 player. He slammed the locker shut and peered down the row to the locker that belonged to Roman, and in that moment he could’ve sworn his skin was on fire. He slammed his bare fist into the cold metal surface and drew it back, leaving a bloodstained dent in its place. He had to get away. He couldn’t be in this building a second longer, knowing that Roman was lurking just beyond a not so distant corner.

Dean drove in silence back to his hotel. Music would’ve distracted him from the road, and he was already distracted enough. But in the solitude and darkness of his car in an empty parking lot at midnight, he knew he needed its sweet embrace. He took off his seat belt and leaned back as the music started. Traitor by Daughtry was the first to play. Of course.

“The only thing worse than a hater is a traitor  
You put the knife right in my back  
Killed any history we had  
And now it’s war, war.”

Dean couldn’t get the look in Roman’s eyes out of his head. Dean had searched and searched within them to find any semblance of hesitation, regret; anything to suggest that Roman wasn’t 100% sure that what he was doing was right. But he found none. Not a single bit. Roman meant what he said. He meant what he had done.

“We were just like brothers  
And we had each other  
We were down for the good times  
We were there for the trouble  
Like a thief in the night, broad daylight  
You stole my sanity  
Now you are the enemy.”

How could Roman do this to him? How could he throw away so many years of friendship so easily? How could he stand to do this? How could he.. Tears were stabbing at Dean’s eyes once more, but he wasn’t sure if they were brought on by anger or hurt. He couldn’t even tell the difference.

Three songs later and Dean was laying quietly against the steering wheel, looking at the cherry scented air freshener in the passenger side vent. Roman had gotten it for him because he said he couldn’t stand the smell and sight of Dean’s messy car during their rides together. Dean angrily ripped it from the vent and tossed it in the back seat.   
The song changed again. My World by Sick Puppies blasted into his ears. He knew he should change it, he knew this song would only make him feel worse, but he couldn’t bring himself to push skip. 

“I’m not comin’ back  
I’m not gonna react  
I’m not doin’ shit for you  
I’m not sitting around  
While you’re tearing it down around us  
I’m not livin’ a lie  
While you swim in denial  
‘Cause you’re already dead and gone  
You leave me out on the curb  
Just like everyone else before you.”

The words hurt deeply, just like Dean knew they would. Yet again, the MP3 player was reading his mind. His sad, broken, betrayed mind. Where would he go from here? Who would he turn to? Roman’s was the only friendship he had bothered with since Seth’s heel turn. No one else could ever come close to what he had with them, and they all knew it. The best he’d get from the other superstars would be looks of pity and dinner invitations because they feel obligated to try to help him. He couldn’t stand the thought of going back there just to become a locker room charity case. That’s not who he was. That’s not what he wanted to become.

The tears’ pressure was building behind his eyes with every second. His heart ached. He would have to put up an act for the cameras and crowds, for the other superstars, but here.. Here he had to accept what he was feeling. His heart wasn’t just aching. His heart was broken. It was then that he wondered why more people didn’t talk about this kind of pain. Romantic relationships leave their scars, but broken friendships and discarded bonds like what he had; this was a new kind of pain. He never wanted to feel it again.  
The tears finally broke from his eyes as he heard the chorus of the song.

“Welcome to my world  
Where everyone I ever need  
Always ends up leaving me alone  
Another lesson burned  
And I’m drowning in the ashes  
Kicking  
Screaming  
Welcome to my world.”

This was Dean’s world now. This pain, this loneliness and these tears that he shared only with the dark corners of hotel parking lots. This was all he had left.

“Fuck,” he whimpered, wiping tears from his face with the back of his hand. “Fuck this.”


End file.
